Words of wisdom and advice from behavior expert, author, and RLC Community Manager, Bill Corbett
What to do if Your Ex is Parenting Differently Than You
My wife and I noticed immediately how differently her teenage daughter behaves and treats us when she returns from a visit with her father. Oftentimes she is rude, abrasive, and immediately begins to complain about how our rules are stupid and how we are controlling her life. And why shouldn't she when her father has no rules. He shows up a couple of times a year to buy her favorite treats and give her gifts or money. Such is the case for so many parents whose children go to another parent's home for visitation. Some parents get similar behaviors from their children when they just go to a grandparent's home when discipline is handled differently. This is one of the frustrating challenges of the modern society... everyone doesn't parent the same. The times have changed and the ownership falls on the engaged parent to react in certain ways to the annoying behaviors we get when our child returns from a visit. Download my READY-TO-PRINT article HERE as a handout to share with others. It offers 5 things you can begin doing immediately.
There are two Web sites attracting more and more children and teens that many parents are not aware of. These sites are a danger to children and parents need to know about them now! One is Omegle and the other is Chat Roulette, and they are both accessible from any Internet-enabled device, such as computers, iPads, kindle-like reader devices, tablets, and even smart phones. Cell Phone Kids Costume - Child Small These two sites are known as “video chat” Web sites and can be accessed by anyone with an Internet accessible device. There is no security or sign up screens to go through and nothing verifies the user’s age. Anyone can simply go to the site and begin conversing with any random person in the world without supervision or regulation. Law enforcement agencies in many cities have issued warnings to parents to keep their kids off of these sites. The Web site boasts that it is a place where meeting strangers is OK but cautions that it is for children 13 and up.
How to Break Your Kids' Addiction to Screen Time What if a parent realizes the importance of limiting screen time for kids, and admits she didn't take measures to set up boundaries at home? Is it too late? I say, not at all, but there are two things the parent must take into consideration: implementing the limitations gradually and being prepared to deal with challenging behavior that may result from the change in boundaries. Why Screen Time is Bad for Kids Experts agree that too much screen time is bad for kids for two reasons: it affects the frontal lobe of the brain and it can become a digital addiction. The frontal lobe is in constant construction until around the age of 25 is responsible for many important cognitive skills, such as judgment and managing emotions, both things we need our youth to develop effectively and on time, and at the very least to keep themselves and others safe. According to the publication Psychology Today, excessive screen time damages br
Punishment is a tool designed to make a child "pay for what they did" and to feel bad about the way they acted. The belief is that the bad feeling will stick with them and motivate them to not repeat the behavior or action. But punishment has side effects that can create more problems for the parent then they originally had. For example, making a child feel bad can backfire and motivate them to hide and lie about their mistakes. It can also damage the parent/child relationship. Think back to your own childhood and remember a time when you were punished. How did you feel? How did you feel about yourself at that moment? What did you want to do as a result of the punishment? How did you feel toward the punisher? I've asked these questions numerous times in my workshops and not once did any adult say they felt good about anything in that moment. We now know that making a child feel bad about what they did affects the way they think and feel about them self.