PLEASE PARENTS: Stop Doing Too Much For Your Child
The other day I watched a mother do everything for her child. She kept getting up from the table every few minutes, responding to her child’s every request, even the things the child should have been doing for herself. Finally, the mother had it and snapped at the little girl, saying that it was time for her to do some particular thing on her own. The child slumped to the ground and began to scream. The mother couldn’t take the crying and got up to retrieve the item her daughter originally wanted her to get for her. The little girl took the item and threw it angrily.
I think children truly want to do things for themselves but they become addicted in some fashion to controlling the parent to do everything for them. If the mom in my story above doesn’t learn to set boundaries for her little girl, mom’s issues are going to escalate as her daughter gets older. The little girl may easily become spoiled and be a burden for other family members and teachers.
Each problem that a child experiences and brings to an adult has only one owner; it’s either the adult or it’s the child who owns the problem. The sooner a parent trains a child to identify their own problems and fix them, the sooner the child grows to become more capable. Watch the clip above from my television show where I lay out some basic steps on how to raise children to become more capable.
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Creating Cooperative Kids is a one-hour cable television show that provide education and guidance to caregivers of children from 18 months to 18 years of age. Each episode features parenting experts and step-by-step instructions for parents on raising high self-esteem and cooperative kids. See the entire episode at http://www.TheParentingShow.tv.
The show's host, Bill Corbett, is the author of the award-winning parenting book series, LOVE, LIMITS, & LESSONS: A PARENT'S GUIDE TO RAISING COOPERATIVE KIDS (in English and in Spanish). He sits on the board of the Network Against Domestic Abuse, the Resource Advisory Committee for Attachment Parenting International, and the management team of the Springfield Parent Academy. Bill's practical experience comes as a father of three grown children, a grandfather of two, and a stepdad to three. You can get FREE parenting advice from him at http://www.CooperativeKids.com.