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What I Loved About the RCB Parenting Course

The cover of the Redirecting Children's Behavior parenting book
There are really good parent education programs, and then there are some with good intentions but containing misguided information. I have personally attended many myself or obtained the instructor's manual from others. Having authored my own, the Love, Limits & Lessons parenting course and instructor training course, I don't hold back on offering my opinion.

This brings me to one of the first ones I attended, way back in 1995. I was looking for parenting help as a father who didn't have a positive role model when I was growing up. I attended the Redirecting Children's Behavior (RCB) course for instructors in Tampa, FL, created by Kathryn Kvols. It instantly changed the way I parented my children and enhanced my relationship with my three.

GET A COPY OF THE LOVE, LIMITS & LESSONS PARENTING BOOK.

What I loved most about this course was how I had learned to, as Kathryn said, PAUSE BEFORE I PARENTED. The course taught me to stop and think about how my emotion in the moment may impact how I'm about to parent. It made me realize that in that moment, I was able to see my child's behavior in a different light.

Another thing I loved was what timeout should really look like. I liked that I had to know when I needed a timeout before my child did.  There are moments in every parent’s journey when patience feels paper-thin—the morning rush, the endless bedtime routine, or the meltdown in the grocery store aisle.

You love your child deeply, but in those seconds, your calm starts to fray.  That’s often when we instinctively send our children to a timeout.  But here’s something powerful to consider: before teaching your child about timeouts, you might need to take one yourself.

The Lesson They’re Really Learning

A mother taking a break out on her deck to calm down
Children learn far more from what we do than what we say. When we step back, take a deep

breath, and give ourselves a moment to reset, we show our children what emotional regulation looks like in action. It tells them: “Big feelings are okay. What matters is how we handle them.”

Timeouts—for parents and children alike—aren’t about punishment. They’re about creating space for calm and connection to return.

What a Parent Timeout Looks Like

Your version of a timeout doesn’t have to be elaborate or long. It might be stepping onto the porch for a breath of fresh air. Sitting quietly in your favorite chair, face in your hands, collecting your thoughts. Closing your eyes and silently reminding yourself, “This is hard, but I can handle it.” These moments of pause aren’t about giving up—they’re about grounding yourself before you guide your child.

PLACE A VISUAL TIMER IN YOUR CHILD'S SELF-QUIETING SPACE.


Helping Your Child Do the Same

When you model calm, your child learns calm. Try reframing “timeout” in your home as a “calm-down break.” You might say, “We both need a minute to cool off. Let’s take our time, and then we’ll talk.” By doing this, you’re teaching your child that: Emotions are temporary. Breaks are healthy. Love and connection remain steady, even when tempers flare. Over time, this builds emotional intelligence and resilience—skills that serve children for a lifetime.

A New Way to See Timeout

Imagine your child looking through the window and seeing you take a quiet moment—not in defeat, but in self-care. That image is more powerful than a thousand lessons.  Parenting isn’t about perfection. It's important to demonstrate to our children that we are also learning how to navigate life's challenges with grace.

Final Thought

Before guiding your child through their next timeout, pause and ask yourself, “Do I need one, too?” Sometimes the most powerful parenting starts not with control, but with calm.

GET MORE PARENTING HELP AT COOPERATIVEKIDS.COM.

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Bill Corbett
Bill Corbett is a nationally recognized parent educator, author, and speaker known for his practical and compassionate approach to raising children. He has helped countless parents, caregivers, and professionals better understand child behavior and discipline through his workshops, seminars, books, and media appearances. As the creator of the "Love, Limits & Lessons" parenting program, Corbett emphasizes respectful and effective communication, age-appropriate expectations, and the importance of emotional connection in child-rearing. His work is grounded in positive discipline strategies that foster cooperation and confidence in both children and parents.

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