Showing posts from March, 2011

Why is Parenting More Difficult Today?

The PARENTING STYLE of yester year was autocratic. The object was to control the child and that made it easier to parent. The autocratic parenting style is used by less families today due to social changes in this country that honor and nurture the human spirit. It has also come about by an explosion in the varying number of books and opinions published by differing methodologies and psychologists. Parents are confused as to how to raise children and many are just throwing their arms up in frustration and guessing their way through a very critical and difficult job. This is exactly what led me to get my psychology degrees, write my books, and develop my organization to help parents; Cooperative Kids. TECHNOLOGY and SOCIAL MEDIA has changed drastically over the years and today, parents must stay up on the latest technology to know what to allow their child to have and use, and how to keep them safe secure from predators and their peers. Children today with cell phones, Facebook and

A Case Against Facebook for Kids and Young Teens

I was involved in an online discussion regarding giving children and young teens access to the social networking application Facebook. My stance is a firm NO and I am outnumbered by parent educators who believe differently. Their position is to allow a child to have Facebook with some safeguards, if the parent believes that the child is emotionally or cognitively ready to use it responsibly, or if the child shows curiosity and a desire to use it. They also feel that social media tools are here to stay for adults and children should be included and trained to use them safely. I advised my fellow parent educators that putting out general parenting advice to the world (as some in this group are) that children and young teens can be given limited or supervised access to Facebook because “social media is here to stay,” or because “the child is asking for it,” or because “every child is different and some may be emotionally or cognitively ready for it” is a mistake. It is a mistake primar

Hanging Out with Our Teens

I have one left at home and she is 13. She is also my stepdaughter and a typical teenage girl. Connecting with a teen is tricky because they have to act like they don’t like their adult caregivers and avoid having to listen to them.   Remember, I said “adult caregivers.”   That means they are very likely to listen to other adults.   It’s just in the wiring of adolescence and we parents just have to deal with it.   Because of this, I always welcome alone time with Olivia, especially on a drive in my truck somewhere.   That’s just how you connect with a teen, by hanging out with them with not a whole lot to say.   I remember letting my own daughter paint my toenails one afternoon after asking her permission to just hang out with her in her room for a bit. This past Sunday, her mom was singing at church and had to leave early for the first service.   That meant Olivia and I got to sleep in a bit and show up for second service.   As the two of us got into my truck for the 30 minute ride