Bill Corbett

Photo courtesy of photographer David Castillo Dominici and Free Digital Photos dot net In my work with parents and teachers on solving behavior challenges with children, I help them identify the problem, possible causes of the behavior, and then possible solutions for eliminating it. My goal is to send the adults away with a few simple step-by-step techniques they can implement immediately to bring about quick change at home or in the classroom. Here are four key questions to ask yourself to help you identify a current behavior issue and some common sense solutions to solve them. QUESTION # 1: Why can’t the behavior occur?  Adults react unnecessarily when children behave in ways that annoy or embarrass the adult, or add more chaos to their already stressed state of mind. Adults also react in this manner in response to feelings of fear that the child may fall down or get hurt in some fashion. Stop before you react unnecessarily and ask yourself, “What is the worst that could...

I’m a father, a grandfather and a stepfather, and am speaking on behalf of all the parents who feel strongly about protecting our children and young teens from what they don’t need to see on the Internet.  I’m addressing this to all the parents whose children have smart phones and tablets with internet connectivity and I’ll make it plain and simple, “Please don’t buy a data plan for that internet-ready device you are providing to your child or young teen!”  At the very least, please don’t let them leave the house with it. I have been called old fashioned, too controlling, or even up tight, so any other labels won’t surprise me… bring it on.  We consider ourselves “doing our job.”  We have worked hard at home, providing our children and grandchildren with supervised access to the Internet so that they can enjoy reasonable entertainment, log in to text books for school, and check the latest funny cat videos on Youtube.  Every one of them has done it all from...

Whether you’re reading this before your children start school or after they have started, it doesn't matter.  Follow these steps to help set them up for success in their new school year. Shut Down Summertime Leniencies .  As school approaches or starts, set up a family meeting (whether you have a significant other or not) to discuss the rules that will change at home: bedtimes, shutting TVs off, removing entertainment electronics from bedrooms, having to turn in social media devices and “friend sleep over rules.”  Allow your child to voice his or her concerns over these changes, adopt the policies, and implement them on a specified date.  It’s also a good idea to document the changes and post them where all can see them; sometimes children become forgetful of what they agreed to. School Supply Shopping .  Sit down with your children and allow them to help you determine what supplies they are going to need for the coming school year.  Yo...

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles FreeDigitalPhotos.net That was the subject line of the message I received from a bewildered parent.  She and her 6-year-old son arrived home after a quick trip to the discount department store and he produced a die cast car that he was playing with.  She told me that the first thing that came to mind for her was that her son was now a thief and the thought was difficult to bear.  Below are the steps I outlined in my reply to her on how to handle the situation. REMAIN CALM .  This is probably the most important tip of all.  A parent’s disposition in a situation can help or hinder a child from learning from the circumstances at hand.  Avoid thinking that your child is a thief and certainly don’t label him.  Do whatever you have to do to muster up the stance that it’s not the end of the world and everything will turn out fine. RETURN TO THE STORE WITH YOUR CHILD .  Do what you can to put dinner on hold, or ...

I received the following email from a parent:   “My son is getting older and I would like to enroll him in a sport this summer.   I have heard horror stories about parents pushing their kids to win, so how do I encourage him to do his best and want to win without making him feel pressured?” First of all I want to acknowledge this mom as an awesome parent for wanting to get your son involved with a sports activity.  Both the physical activity and his experience with a team will contribute greatly to his development.  But most importantly, it will keep him off of the video screen and out of his room for a good portion of the time over the summer. A crucial part of keeping this boy motivated to continue with an activity requires this mom to control and limit the things that would keep her son from wanting to participate in a sport; such as his video games and computer.  I encourage her to put a limitation of time on these time-wasting distractions and de...

This is for all the parents who set out NOT to spank their children, but end up doing it anyway; you are NOT bad parents, sometimes you just don’t know what else to do.  I believe you may get frustrated to the point of using it to gain the child’s attention or as an attempt to stop challenging behaviors immediately.  I can say that I've been in your shoes!  I raised 3 children of my own and often felt myself get to the point of having the urge to spank.  So I feel for parents and know how hard it is when our children push our patience to the upper limits. Stop the Whinning: THE NEW WISH BOOK FOR BOYS I was the oldest of eight children and took notice of my parent’s anger and how it would provoke them to the point of spanking, and they did.  I remember having the sense that one or both of them would be bothered by something outside of my control and then I would do something that kids do and it would push them to their breaking point.  I would g...

Have you ever noticed how your children love to catch you making a mistake, especially when you do something out of order?  Children learn about the world around them by sameness and routine and they crave patterns that they can learn from. One evening we had visitors over for dinner and it was a special occasion.  The food was coming out of the oven in phases to keep it warm.  One of our young guests must have been hungry so she served herself what was on the table and took a bite.  My oldest daughter, the perfectionist child, was quick to catch her breaking a dinner-time rule and called attention to the violation.  Our family procedures had trained her that we all start eating together, after the blessing. Use this teaching tool to your advantage, especially when you want to increase the cooperation from your young children.  Family situations such as the morning rush, dinner time and bedtime are 3 situations that can be stressful on parents an...